Last weekend, I took a 90 year old dementia patient to the store.1 I am vigilant as I walked this elderly gentleman through the store. I knew we weren't getting much, but I had him push a shopping cart. He doesn't use a walker, he's quite proud so I doubt he ever will. But, having him push the cart gave me reassurance that he won't fall easily.
I walk right next to him, so that he doesn't put everything he sees in the cart. I guide him to his favorite isles. He likes cheese, Prosciutto, Salami, and ice cream: not the “scoopy kind,” he doesn't have a scoop, so it's ice cream sandwiches.
As we meanders through the store, he repeats that I can get anything I want. My standard response is, "Thank you so much, if I see something I'll get it."
I won't.
Then, he asks, "How about some flowers? Let me buy you some flowers."
My repeated response, "What a lovely gesture. Maybe next time."
We finally circle back to the check out area. I notice people making room for us. Many smiles. One young woman, ahead of us, turns and says, "You can go ahead of me."
We both thank her. My elderly gentleman friend thanks her several times.
Again, he says to me, "Can I get you some flowers?"
I spew out my standard declination. The young woman behind us says, "I've never heard anyone turn down flowers!"
I smile, and say, "I won't have time to get them in water."
My elderly friend looks at this young woman and says, "I could get flowers for you."
She pauses and says, "I don't think my boyfriend would like it."
Instantly, our elderly friend exclaims, "Well you are a ROSE!"
Stunned, the young woman blinks back tears.
Another exclamation, "A Rose and don't you ever forget it."
A tear slips down her cheek. She quietly says, "You made my day."
Our gentleman friend says, "Well, your smile made mine."
I look up. Several people in the grocery checkout line are smiling. I see a different hand wipe away a tear.
Everyday Kindness: "You are a rose, and don't you ever forget it."
I do this for many reasons, but the basic reason is that I feel better after I help someone less fortunate than I am. So, I guess it's selfish. I was chatting with my nephew, Parker, about it, and he disagreed that it's selfish. He said, "It's perspective."
Parker concluded, that helping others helps one see that no matter how tough it gets, there are those less fortunate. I agree.
You are a rose. My beloved survivors: Don't you ever forget it.