Tie-Down Questions
Simple statements with a short question at the end, you know?
This is a post from Paperdolls.Today, under the section “Sales Techniques.” The intent of this section is to help people, particularly the vulnerable such as sexual assault survivors, to understand if and when they might be manipulated by sales techniques. If you wish to unsubscribe or subscribe to any sections of Paperdolls.Today, please follow Substack’s instructions.
Tie-Down Questions
A tie-down1 is a question at the end of a sentence that demands a yes. The tie-down is hung on the end of the sentence, as in, "The crocus are coming up, aren't they?"
As Tom Hopkins explains that when you (the sales person) asks a question with a tie down at the end, "smile warmly and gently nod your head yes."
Hopkins continues, "Since it's not a threatening question in any way, shape or form, prospective buyers will likely agree with their own nod or yes answer."
"Selling is the art of asking the right questions to get the minor yeses that all you to lead your prospect to the major decision. It's a sum function, and the final sale is nothing more than the sum total of all your yeses." --Tom Hopkins
I have a couple of observations:
"smile warmly and gently nod your head yes."
How manipulative is that? I'm cringing. However, Tommy Hopkins is correct, if anyone has a warm tone and nods gently, it's almost involuntary for the person on the other side of the conversation to nod in agreement. Combine that with the trained sales person asking fairly innocent questions to get the prospect to the ultimate yes.
Anyone can be manipulated.
Every single human with any degree of social skills can fall prey to these manipulations. Do not beat yourself up, if a warm, kind sales person helped you--especially if it's something you really needed or wanted to buy. Why not give the business to the kind ones? Use caution if you are seeing these techniques and it’s not something you want or need.
I'm only showing this sales techniques to help you be aware. And, to be acutely aware if someone is trying to manipulate you.
My Therapist’s Feedback about Tie-Down Questions.
It’s a slight deviation from the sales training message of this post. But, I think Karen’ Fisher’s 2 observation to me is worth mentioning. Karen asked why I always answered questions with questions, and why when I made an important statement, I typically added a "Tie Down" question at the end. At the time, she didn't know the sales lingo, but I did. Back then, I would often end a sentence with, "You know?" Or even end a statement with an upward tilt to my voice, as if I were asking a question.
Karen told me that women tend to do that much more frequently than men do. I started observing that phenomenon everywhere. I think these speech patterns are still prevalent in our society today. It seems women are more contrite.
As for me, those speech patterns are ingrained in my habits of interaction. Fortunately, I'm usually aware of it. At the very most important times,I can remain calm and make definite statements without sounding insecure. Tie-Down questions, can make one sound a bit insecure, if the tie down question isn’t in the appropriate setting. Therapy isn’t the appropriate place. I definitely did not use a questioning tone or a tie down question in the Family Meeting3 when I told my family that I was dealing with the ramifications of the sexual abuse of my childhood.
Conclusion of "Tie-In Questions"
A tie down question, in a more nefarious situation could be, "You love me, don't you?"
The follow up question to that particular question....raises the hair on the back of my neck. It’s similar to the warning that lightening is about to strike.
In summary, please remember that most of the time, sales people are simply trying to help. An extra bonus is that they are able to help prospects find the services or products that best suit their needs. However, as with many skills--it can be used for nefarious purposes. Like a domestic abuser manipulation a partner or a pedophile grooming a child.
Knowledge is power.
Do not be afraid. If you ever feel like you are being manipulated, simply take a break or leave. If you encounter a sales person with integrity, one who is simply trying to help (and make a commission) say yes and buy if it fits your needs.
Hopkins, How to Master the Art of Selling, 64-68
My therapist
Daniels & Scott, Paperdolls & Cowboy Boots, 130-139