Stay Tuned: #3 The Snake Pit
"Navigating the Snake Pit" is coming soon
David Hardy and I met again this past week. This final article of this series: providing guidelines to survivors who want to tell their story in a public fashion must be done right and it is taking us longer than anticipated to get it right for you.
We decided that this will definitely be a co-authored article by David Hardy, Esq and myself.
April’s Concerns:
Survivors will probably experience a degree of DARVO by speaking out. I want survivors to be prepared, and possibly offer some techniques on how to cope with it.
Victims/Survivors must not hold onto the hope that the only way healing is possible is if justice is served.
Even if your perpetrator or perpetrators are convicted and sentenced to jail, you still have to heal. Please see #2 of this series, If someone breaks your leg, you must get treatment and let it heal. Regardless of what the monster does who broke your leg.
It is highly likely that your perpetrator will not receive any type of jail time or be required to pay you any financial compensation, and
Even if they do go to jail and pay you some restitution, it will never be enough. You can heal, and I hope you do, regardless of their punishment or lack thereof.
Most pedophiles have dozens, if not hundreds of other victims. In the soon to be released, Navigating the Snake Pit article, I want to encourage you to reach out to other survivors of this same perpetrator or perpetrators. My concern for reaching out to other victims/survivors goes all the way back to the forward in “Paperdolls: Healing from Sexual Abuse in Mormon Neighborhoods”
”I believe revealing these facts about individuals before they are ready to remember1 is a violation.”
My quandary, there is strength in numbers.2 But, how do I encourage you to reach out to others considering my basic belief that shocking another victim/survivor with the gruesome truth won’t harm them deeply? How do I advise you to reach out to other potential survivors/victims if those others haven’t dealt with their own childhood sexual abuse? What if they’ve blocked it out? Would reaching out to them be another violation? Or could it be handled in a way to not be a violation?
Hence, we are still crafting, researching, and formulating this next article.
David’s Concerns:
David has spoken briefly about the legal ramifications, and he doesn’t want his writing to be considered legal advise.3 When I suggested, “Let’s do a disclaimer that this doesn’t constitute legal advice or opinion.” David flinched at that idea. I think he mumbled something about it being weasily4. He might have to do that, but my interpretation of his reaction on a disclaimer was that he didn’t want it. So, we shall see. Please stay tuned, he has some other legal precedent issues that he’s addressing, and I’ll let him write it.
Conclusion:
Please be patient. We’ll get it for you and we’ll get it done soon. For a few weeks now, I’ve been looking for a good image for this article. I searched for snakes and snake pits. I’m sure that it’s the cookies stored in my browser, but this popped up on one of my social media accounts. Until David and I finish up this final article, I leave you with this:
Now I would say something like “before they have come to terms with their childhood sexual abuse”
I’m sure you are aware of all the courageous survivors in the “Epstein Files.” If only one of them spoke out, it probably wouldn’t have as much impact on our global psyche. But, there are many. United and strong. There is strength in numbers.
Please know my lay understanding is summarizing a fairly complicated conversation.
Again, please remember it’s my impression of a rather in depth topic and I was trying to read his body language.
I'm always appreciative of how careful and respectful you are. You have helped me immensely!!!